People often talk about meeting the right one, finding the right one, how do you know he’s the right one etc…. the truth is, there is no “right one” out there just waiting for you so they can have a perfect relationship with you – with no issues. There are lots of bad ones, and there are lots of good ones, but it’s up to you to choose the right one for you- the one you will spend the rest of your life with. This is a series on choosing the right one – click here for the rest of the series.
Some people say experience is the best teacher, I disagree. Well, I agree, as long as I’m learning from other people’s experiences… I don’t have to experience cancer for me to know that cancer is painful. I don’t have to go to jail for me to know that I shouldn’t steal, or commit a crime. I don’t have to suffer, just so that I learn I shouldn’t make stupid decisions… I would rather learn from other people’s experiences…
And the beautiful thing about life is that there is always an abundance of people willing to give you their advice. And it’s up to you to decide whether the advice applies to you.
When it comes to relationships, people will give you all sorts of rules – don’t marry him unless you’ve dated for a year, marry him quickly – because you will never know everything about him until you’re married, sleep with him before you’re married to test whether he’s good in bed, don’t sleep with him until you’re married to test his commitment to the Lord, cook for him before you’re married so he’ll fall in love with you, don’t cook for him or he’ll always expect you to cook, don’t nag before you’re married so he doesn’t leave you, nag before you’re married because you need to be yourself, let him know all your financial details so there is complete honesty, don’t let him know all your financial details in case he’s bad with money or you need an escape plan… The list goes on…
For every rule, there is an exception. For every similar situation, there are often distinct differences, so what worked for one person may not work for you. Even what I tell you on this blog may work for me but not for you, or it may work for you but may not work for your friend…
So when someone starts saying “If I were you, I would…” just nod your head, listen, pick out what you can, and leave the rest, because in the long run, they are not you, and they never will, so it’s up to you to make the best decision for yourself based on your own priorities and circumstances… because afterall, life doesn’t always work out the way you expect – sometimes it’s a pleasant surprise, other times it’s well… a learning experience.
smile, smile, smile 🙂
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