She says “I slept with him, now I have to marry him”
I heard about a girl recently who promised to wait until she was married before she had sex, but one day she was with her boyfriend, and one thing led to another, and the next thing she knew, they had slept together. The problem was that it didn’t end there. They felt guilty for a bit, but seemed to always have an excuse to get back in bed together. She had broken up with him, but was contemplating getting back with him because she was rationalizing that since she had promised to only sleep with one man, then she had to marry this man, but she felt that she would always regret sleeping with him before they got married.
I was wondering what I would have said if she had come to me. All I could think about was the regret. The regret of giving yourself away before marriage. I was listening to a podcast about it the other day (Revive our Hearts), and they talked about how we don’t think about the consequences of our actions before making decisions. We don’t think about the possibility of STDs, or pregnancy, or the crazy emotional attachment. We are focused on our feelings at the time, and what we want and desire. The lady also talked about how her prior sexual experiences were now affecting her in here marriage, and how she wished she could have made different choices.
I was reading in Proverbs (Prov. 6:32) a few days ago, and it really spoke to me.
Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding;
He who does so destroys his own soul.
I thought about replacing the word “adultery” with “sexual immorality” or “sexual promiscuity,” and I thought to myself that being sexually promiscuous is not wise. And people who participate in it do not really understand that although it may feel pleasurable, and although it may feel as if they’re getting away with something, what they don’t realize is that they are really destroying their own soul.
This sex thing is so serious. It’s not easy, but making a wise decision is so important.
So I guess if she were to ask me for advice I would ask her if being around him drew her closer to God or away from God. And then I would ask what advice she would give her daughter if she came for advice regarding the same situation.
How about you: What would be your advice?
I would like to hear from you: Talk to me.