So you’re a virgin? What exactly do you mean by that?
Like the word “Christian,” whenever someone tells me that they are virgins I just nod my head and smile. It almost means nothing… God calls us to give our bodies as a living sacrifice, but just because a person has not had sex does not mean that they’ve given their bodies as a living sacrifice…or that they should be desired…
I have observed at least three categories of virgins (feel free to add to the list)
1. There’s the Ms. Mary (mother of Jesus) virgin: This virgin’s thoughts are focused on God. She is seeking God, trying to find her purpose, and willing to do whatever she has to do to glorify God. She knows that it was only by the grace of God she is where she is, and she feels privileged to be called by God, and to be able to serve with her life. (this is the kind of virgin God desires)
2. Then there’s the “I do everything but…” virgin: This virgin has done everything (I’m not going to get graphic). They rationalize in their minds that they are pure and holy because they haven’t “technically” slept with someone. They pride themselves on their skills and the strategic ways they are able to enjoy sin without “technically” losing their virginity.
3. Then there’s the “I’m just better than everyone” virgin: This virgin doesn’t realize that it’s only by the grace of God that they have been able to stay pure. They think that they are the best thing since sliced bread, and can’t understand why everyone isn’t flocking to marry them. They get anxious and frustrated about the whole singleness situation, and look down on everyone else for not being as pure as they are. Sometimes they may also be referred to as the “it’s all about me” virgin.
I learned in the past few years that sometimes it is better to be with people who are not virgins but who have realized the importance of giving their whole beings to God, confessing their sins and turning away.
The people that call themselves virgins but have done everything else are deceived, and will not only destroy themselves (if they don’t change) they will bring you down as well. The ones that think that they’re doing God a favor by being virgins are so proud and selfish that the whole relationship will be about them and how superior they are and how they’re doing you a favor by dating you.
You want a person that is willing to serve you, so that you can’t help but want to serve them…if the person you’re in a relationship with, or contemplating marrying does not make you think of Jesus then this is not “the one.” (even if they call themselves virgins).
What other kinds of “virgins” have you noticed?